


i wanted to walk with you, too

by Echoe



Category: Fire Emblem Series, Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Angst, F/F, Fire Emblem: Three Houses Church Route Spoilers, POV Second Person, in this house we love to suffer :), technically byleth's gender is never mentioned but it was written with f!byleth in mind bc im gay
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-29
Updated: 2019-09-29
Packaged: 2020-10-29 22:43:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,230
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20804198
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Echoe/pseuds/Echoe
Summary: Edelgard is kneeling before you.There's only one thing left for you to do.(You're not sure you can do it.)





	i wanted to walk with you, too

**Author's Note:**

> on my very first playthrough (like two months ago), i ended up on the church route thinking it was the regular edelgard route (bc i was convinced that the church route was some kind of secret route that you unlocked later on or something!), and i followed it wondering when i'd finally get to reunite with edelgard, up until the fight against her when i realized that this was not, in fact, edelgard's route :)  
and i suffered :)  
(unrelated but english isn't my first language and i'm fairly sure i fucked up my tenses and stuff so i'm sorry about that)

You don't regret a lot of things in your life. After all, for the longest time, you probably weren't even capable of feeling regret. But now, you can say for certain that there are exactly two things that you wish could have gone differently.

The first thing is your father's death. Sothis had told you many times before disappearing that it wasn't your fault. That, clearly, he had been fated to die. That there was nothing you could have done. She had spent night whispering words of comfort to you, but no matter how hard she had tried, to this day, you still couldn't shake the feeling that, had you been stronger, you could have saved him.  
And then there's something else.  
Your darling student, Edelgard.  
You wish you hadn't hesitated, back then, in the Holy Tomb, when you had been asked to choose, even though you hadn't realized you had a choice, at the time. You had only stood still when Rhea had ordered you to slay your student, and that had sealed your fates. Edelgard had vanished with Hubert, and that was it. You were no longer on the same side.

Now, as she kneels before you, you wish you could go back in time. Make things different.  
Stay at her side.

"It looks as though... my path... will end here."

But you _had_ been given a chance to fix things, hadn't you?  
But you hadn't taken it.  
When you had found Edelgard, five years later at the Goddess Tower, you had hesitated. Again.  
Aren't you being selfish, asking for yet another chance?  
It's too late now.

"My teacher... claim your victory. Strike me down. You must!"

She's right, and you know it. If you didn't want this path, you shouldn't have hesitated so much.  
You should have chosen her.  
Now all other paths have burned. There's only this one left.

"Even now... across this land, people are killing each other. If you do not act now, this conflict... will go on forever."

You had almost forgotten that this wasn't just about you and Edelgard. This is about all of Fòdlan. But, really, you don't care all that much.  
You remember when Edelgard had asked you what you would do with the power Sothis had gifted to you. Who you would use it for. You hadn't answered yourself, because you it wasn't like you had any goals of your own that you wanted to achieve no matter the cost. You hadn't answered the people of Fòdlan, either, because you were no hero. You didn't care for the greater good. No, instead, you had answered 'my students'. It had surprised you. It had been at this moment that you had realized just how much you cared about them.

"You path... lies across my grave. It is time for you to find the courage to walk it."

And yet here you were. About to strike down your favorite student.

(Wait, favorite?  
...  
Yes, she was (still is) your favorite.  
You're not sure when it happened, either. You just know it.)

Your chest hurt, and you're not really sure why. But the sight of Edelgard on her knees, hurt and painfully breathing (it's your fault) makes your chest incredibly tight. It almost hurts.

"If I must fall... let it be by your hand."

Your eyes sting. Your chest hurts. Yet, you take a step forward, then another.  
You have to do this.  
You don't have the right to back down now.

You raise your sword above your head, eyes fixated on your student (no, former student, you think. You don't have the luxury to call her your student anymore.).  
It's time.

"I wanted... to walk with you..."

You bring your sword down.

...

...

But all it hits is the ground.

"My... teacher...?"

You had stricken the ground next to Edelgard.  
It's then that you understand that you just can't do it.  
You can't kill her, even if you have to. So you let go of your weapon, and fall to your knees, too. But you don't look at the emperor, gaze fixated on the ground, even if your eyes are actually unfocused. You put your hands on the cold stone, having a hard time supporting your body. You kinda feel like just collapsing on the ground, right here and there.

"Professor... What... what are you _doing_?"

There's confusion, there. Hurt, too, maybe. A bit of anger also? You're not sure. You're not really good at reading emotions.  
Something tells you that you should probably try to say something, though.

"I'm sorry", you say softly, and then your tears start falling. You don't sob, don't make a noise. The tears just fall on cold, hard stone. You don't look up, but you can hear Edelgard starting to move.

"I can't do it, Edelgard."

You bring your head up to see her standing up slowly, a bit wobbly, Aymr in hand. She looks down at you, a pained expression on her face.

You realize that she doesn't have a choice, either.  
There's only one possible outcome for this battle, because of the choices you made.  
One of you has to die.  
And if you can't bring yourself to kill Edelgard, then...  
...  
At least, you like this outcome better. You think that she deserves to live more than you do. There's something that she wants to do, after all. But you? What you want, you can't have it anymore. So there's no point.

When you see her raise her axe, though, you feel a rush of emotions threatening to spill out.

You remember all these times you invited her for tea, and the gentle warmth you felt when she finally accepted your invitation.  
You remember her telling you about her past, her siblings, her crests. You remember the quiet fire that had burned inside you upon hearing about the atrocities she had gone through.  
You remember her telling you about her nightmares. You remember wanting to hug her, then.  
You remember when you learned that she loved red carnations, and how hard you worked to grow the most beautiful ones, and the look of delight on her face when you had gifted her the flowers.  
You remember your first meeting at the Goddess Tower, the story of how her parents met, and how you had wanted to ask her for a dance, even though you had refused all dances that evening, because you didn't even know how to dance to begin with. But you had wanted to dance with her all the same, because it had seemed like something that would have been nice to do with her.  
You remember you father's ring, and remember thinking, at some point, that maybe you could give it to Edelgard, later in your life.

Your tears stop. You meet her eyes one last time. And then, you realize.

"I love you", you whisper. You almost feel bad for saying it, because you then see her eyes glisten, tears threatening to fall, and you think that you probably just made things even harder for her. So you lower your head.

"I wanted to walk with you, too."

The sickening sound of flesh and bones echoes in the room, and then, all is silent.

(You're no longer there to see it, but afterward, the emperor falls back to her knees and cradles your body, and on the inside only, she's crying.)

**Author's Note:**

> i hope you suffered because i fucking cried writing this  
(also my twitter is @audrey_potatoes if you wanna come cry about edeleth with me. or yell at me. or just talk really im lonely hi)  
you know originally i had wanted to write a cuter ending, maybe let them hug it out and shit u kno? but no i decided that we all had to suffer sorry


End file.
